Notes About 2020 and Beyond

clarity Dec 18, 2020

This year has been one of the most unique years in our lifetimes. Whoever thought that we would be in the middle of the worst pandemic in a century? We all want to turn the page and move on. We also had to deal with a rambunctious election and issues dealing with race.  Instead of wanting to turn the page, just accept the fact that this period of time is part of our life experience.

 Over the years and dealing with my disability, I have learned that challenges need to be accepted and dealt with, not avoided. Some have dealt with it by denying it or blaming others or other countries. I look at the pandemic as a once-in-a-century occurrence and, for a couple of decades, the experts warned us that something like this could and probably would happen.

 Although my lifestyle changed a lot this year by not traveling, by not watching sports at my local watering hole, by not being able to go to the mall, I choose to focus on the blessings in my life.  This year was one of...

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What Are You Responsible For?

clarity Nov 06, 2020

 

Our lives are not independent of outside factors. We are dependent on the actions of others.  We are part of an ecosystem with other human beings. One characteristic of human beings is that we are not perfect beings. We all have different emotions, different mindset, and different experiences.  

 One component to an amazing mindset and an amazing narrative is personal responsibility.  With so many factors and so many random occurrences, it’s often challenging to decipher what we are and are not responsible for. In addition, with so many random occurrences coming at us, it’s often challenging to make sense of it all and to take personal responsibility for it. It’s even more challenging when you were born into a worse situation than someone else.

 My own personal mantra is my disability is not my fault, but it’s my responsibility. I am disabled because of a doctor’s negligence. However, I am responsible for making the best...

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Redefine Strength

clarity narrative Oct 02, 2020

 

 A big part of success is developing our strengths and mindset required for whatever we want to accomplish, whether that’s growing a company, getting ahead in our industry or even raising children. Part of our narrative is what strength really means.

 If I ask you to imagine a strong person, you might envision a tough, rugged, person.  Unfortunately, different goals take different strengths. Our narrative about what strength is can often get in the way of developing the true strengths that are needed in order to accomplish our goals.

 My disability forced me to redefine my definition of what it means to be strong. My mindset was strongly influenced by my parents who are two of the strongest people I know. Part of my father’s success was due to sheer hustle. When my dad was younger, we joked that my dad would never walk. Everything was a slow run.

 The way my parents achieved success was not an option for me. I had to create my own...

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It Is What It Is

clarity Sep 24, 2020

Oftentimes, it’s challenging to make sense of our lives and it feels that life often happens to us.  Nobody has total control over their life and circumstances. With that being said, part of our job is to take control of the aspects that we can and have faith that the rest will work itself out.

There is a popular saying that is often used to understand the randomness of life, but there is another way of looking at the statement that can be empowering.

 Are you ready?

 The statement is…

Wait for it…

 It is what it is

 Traditionally, people use this statement when life happens to them. Guess what? Life happens to everybody. If you’re human, life happens. You are going to have bad days. You are going to have unexpected expenses. You are going to have disagreements. You are going to have rude waiters. And so on. Guess what? So, does everybody else.

 Realize that there are two powerful parts of life. There is reality and there is...

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All You Need Is 5 Minutes

clarity Sep 11, 2020

 

We all have dreams and goals. We also have challenges that get in the way of our goals. Lastly, we all have obligations that take up our time and energy. There is very little left over for our dreams. It seems that we are pulled in different directions. However, I believe that big dreams take small sacrifices and we can start achieving our dreams and our goals five minutes at a time. 

Have you ever had an issue that annoyed you?  It could be as simple as a rattle in your car. It could be a buggy computer. It could be that something small is off.  More annoying than that is when a couple of weeks go by and it turns out that you fixed it within five minutes. I’m asking you to apply that to the rest of your life. I want you to start achieving your goals five minutes at a time. 

Of course, it’s going to take you more than five minutes to achieve your goals, but the goal of this concept is to get you out of your old mindset and get you into a new...

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Be Intentional

clarity Aug 28, 2020

Our lives can feel random sometimes.  We have goals and dreams.  However, we feel that life, obligations, challenges, and other outside factors get in the way of life.

 One way that we can take control of our destiny is to set intentions in our lives. With that being said, no matter how intentional you are, there are going to be situations that have the potential to get in the way.  If you are intentional about how you spend your money, the water heater will still break.  No matter how intentional you are on your diet, you will still crave ice cream or your coworkers will bring cake.  Don’t make the mistake of thinking that these random occurrences should cause you to give up.  Don’t be a victim.

 In order to be intentional you need to have control over your time, your energy, and your emotions. 

 Much of my life is dictated by the needs of my disability.  It often feels that I have to get permission from my...

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Do You Struggle with Motivation?

clarity Jul 10, 2020
 

In tough times, it’s often challenging to find motivation. These days, our way of life is being highjacked by the coronavirus and with political uncertainty. These problems seep into our lives like nothing before. A consequence is that many people have to change what they do professionally and how they go after their goals. When times are tough, motivation and inspiration fall by the wayside. However, motivation and inspiration need to be one of the tools that we use to get through these tough times and excel when things get back to normal.

 Throughout my life, I have struggled with motivation and inspiration. There were periods of my life where all I could see was every single challenge in front of me. Over the years, I learned that if I wanted to achieve success, be happy, and be motivated, I had to look beyond my challenges and create motivation.

 A mistake that I see many people make is the fact that they think that motivation and inspiration is something that...

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The Most Important Relationship

clarity relationships Feb 14, 2020
 

This month couples all over celebrate Valentine’s Day. In order to have positive relationships, you must keep developing the most important relationship in your life. That is the relationship you have with yourself. 

Life is about knowing what you want, why you want it, navigating challenges, growing yourself, and other factors. If you don’t have a positive and healthy relationship with yourself, you limit yourself on how far you can go in life. Furthermore, the narrative in your life can either propel you or hold you back.

 Another factor that can influence our relationship with our self is how much blame we put on ourselves versus the outside world. If someone has a weak locus of control, they assume that whatever happens is not their fault. However, if someone has a strong locus of control, they take personal responsibility and look within to either solve problems or excel.

 Next, it’s about hanging out with yourself. In order to have a healthy...

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What I have Learned By Not Having Complete Access To My Phone

clarity Feb 07, 2020
 

We all have a computer in our pockets. That computer is called a cell phone. The cell phone revolutionized communication.  If you use it in the right way, you can increase productivity and even make money.  It also allows people to be mobile and free.  On the flip side, it has become one of the most distracting elements in our lives.  According to 60 Minutes, app developers employ the same technology to keep us using our phones as slot machine manufacturers. They are incentivized to keep us on our phones.

I have a unique relationship with my phone. My physical challenges prevent me from interacting with my phone like others. Most things in my life are more challenging for me, and using the phone is amongst the laundry list of challenging activities in my life. Besides the effort it takes to use my phone, I’m very limited on the tasks I can perform. I can make phone calls. I can skim text and emails. I can also check sports’ scores. Beyond that, I...

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New Year's Check-in

clarity Jan 24, 2020

This is the last week of the month. It’s the fourth week of the decade. When we start the year, we are excited to accomplish our goals. Whether that is professional, personal, relationships, hobbies, fitness, or any other type of goals, we are excited. The first part of our goals is fueled by excitement. However, as we start working on our goals, that excitement ebbs and flows. We have to battle the War of Attrition.

The War of Attrition

As human beings, we always like something new. Our goals seem like shiny new toys.  However, most goals require constant and repetitive action. Some of these actions may get boring, frustrating, or just tedious. The first couple of times that you eat that salad you might feel emboldened, but, after the tenth, the twentieth, or even the hundredth time, you may resent eating healthy. Treating your goals as your job is very important.  You have to take your goals and your dreams very seriously.

Considering the Alternative

When...

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