A majority of our behavior is learned. We learn from the people that we interact with, the media, our friends and family, etc. By watching people, we learn how to think and act.  We learn behaviors and the level of success we can achieve. Our notion of success is dictated by what we see and what we hear. Nobody was born being a basketball star, football star, a writer, or anything else. We were all introduced to these professions.

 Most people base their mindset or their way of thinking on the people they have access to growing up such as their parents, extended family, teachers, and other members of their community. In order to become amazing, you must get outside of your circle of influence and let amazing people inspire you.

There is a sea of people who can inspire you. They can give you new ideas, new methodologies, and a roadmap to your own version of amazing success. When I grew up, I did not meet any speakers or any authors. I met my first speaker in my mid-20s....

In our quest to become amazing and live out our goals, we need to be encouraged by the right people in the right way. We underestimate the influence that others have on us. One of the keys to amazing success is to be surrounded and influenced by people who can actually help us on our journey to our dreams and our goals.

Here is a list of people in your life and how to build relationships that can help you reach your goals:

Friends and family

We all have friends and family who we rely on for emotional support and advice.  These people can encourage our dreams or dismiss them. They can empower you or they can tell you that your dreams are ridiculous. They can even ridicule you in a passive aggressive way. One of the wrong assumptions that people make is that we think that people that are closest to us should encourage us in the right way. However, the reality is that the people that are closest to us base their encouragement on their own way of thinking or their own mindset....

Convention says that we need to always need to be motivated and inspired. Although this is true, and I believe that we need to find a way to find motivation and inspiration, we also need to be encouraged by others to take the right action. We all take cues from the people who we spend the most time with. Encouragement is not always positive. For example, we may have friends who encourage us to stay out late, drink that extra glass of wine, or purchase fashions that are slightly over our budget.

According to Noah St. John, every successful person has an abundance of encouragement. In addition, Jim Rhone said that we are the average of the five people we hang out with the most. In order to become amazing, we have to seek encouragement. We also have to seek the encouragement of people who can actually help us reach our goals.

Encouragement is more than a cheerleader. Encouragement is emotional support and advice on the next steps. If you look at any addiction recovery program,...

We are all part of many conversations. We have conversations with our friends, our family, colleagues, acquaintances, and other interactions. These conversations have an influence on our mindset, the way we think about life, the way go we after our goals, and even how much success we can have. Being influenced by positive people can be empowering and can lead to amazing success.

 The problem is that, when we have new goals, we don’t engage in the conversations that are needed in order to achieve success.

When many people talk about life and moving forward, they do it with a complaining tone. They hint that life is not fair or that there are no opportunities. However, when you are around people who have achieved amazing success, they do it with a tone of empowerment and personal responsibility.

When I was 20, I decided to go to USC. When I decided to go, I wanted to meet people and have experiences. For me, this was a big risk and I thought this was a foolish rationale. I...

When you are working on your goals or you set new goals, one of the activities that you need to perform is a constant diet of information that will help you on your path.  There are several reasons why you need this diet of information.

Here are some reasons:

1. Know your next steps. When you are accomplishing your goals, it’s important to have clarity on the next steps and have the actions that you take effect your goal. One of the problems is that when people don’t have a clear vision of the steps that they need to take and when they fall short, they blame other factors or take the idea of “it was meant to be” or “it is what it is.” Also, what works at one level may not work in another level. For example, an exercise routine may work to lose the first ten pounds, but it may not work for the next ten pounds. An entrepreneur may grow a business to a certain point. However, to scale that business to the next level may take different...

Becoming amazing involves taking on challenges and as important as taking new emotional challenges. If you don’t have a positive emotional diet, you limit your chances of amazing success.

I have learned how to motivate and inspire myself. When I get down, I quickly consume more positivity, look at the blessings in my life, consume inspiring materials, and focus on my loved ones.

Since part of amazing success is taking on new challenges, you don’t want to waste your time and energy on issues that will not get you on the track to amazing.  Oftentimes, people focus on politics, the economy, and other issues rather than focusing on what it takes for them to become amazing. They might even get caught up in other’s drama.

We all have a tolerance for emotional discomfort. The goal is to divert this energy in to becoming amazing instead of focusing on the rude cashier or the rude waiter or the argument that you had with a family member.

There have been periods in my...

Last week, I wrote about the importance of a healthy emotional diet. We are influenced by the events surrounding us, and we are emotional creatures. It is also important to note that we have a natural tendency to disproportionally focus on the negative. Also, part of our process is to look at what is wrong and try to navigate our challenges. There have been periods in my life when I have been focused on my challenges as a disabled person. Here are ways that can balance out the negative and focus on the positive.

Another benefit to a healthy emotional diet is that it gives you additional ideas and strategies. It also can help with tunnel vision.

Diet Plan

1. Reading and other education: There is information out there that can help you become amazing. I categorize these into two buckets. The first bucket is personal development. This includes learning about how to have better relationships, how to get what you want out of life, how to become a better leader, how to get over a...

Emotions play a part in how you go after your goals, go about your day, and deal with challenges that come up. Human beings are naturally programmed to look at the negative rather than focus on the positive. In fact, people need three positive experiences to counterbalance one negative experience. In some cases, one negative five-minute encounter can ruin some people’s day. Even worse, some people’s days are ruined when someone cuts them off on the freeway, which only takes a few seconds. 

We also have to deal with life and the emotions that come with the everyday struggles. Some paths in life have more struggles than others. For example, being a pediatric oncologist involves being constantly bombarded with bad news and negative experiences. In addition, we may have unique circumstances that we have to deal with. Ingrained in my life are the negative messages and the psychological ramifications that my cerebral palsy presents. I am constantly reminded of everything...

Summer is a time when most people take some time off and take some sort of vacation. It’s also a time when many people have to adjust their schedules for the family. The bottom line is that routine and habits may loosen. 

 As we approach the fall, we have about three months before the holidays. Let’s make those three months as productive as possible. Here are a couple of strategies to help you make the most out of the rest of this year:

Strategy #1

Set goals for the rest of the year

Goal setting is not just for the first of the year. You want to reevaluate your goals and set intermediate goals that support your ultimate goals. Ninety-day goals are a valuable tool to get you on the path to amazing. Also, set different kinds of goals.  These can be professional, relationship, personal development, fitness, financial, and more.

Strategy #2

Make sure habits and routines are efficient

During the summer, my two boys were home. We slept in more, and...

A big part of mindset is emotional discipline. If mindset is the way we think about our lives, go after our goals, deal with challenges, deal with others, have clarity, and other factors, then having emotional discipline is a factor for amazing success.

In order to accomplish amazing success and have a good mindset, we need to take direct actions. We need the actions that get us to amazing success. A part of every decision we make is dictated by our emotions and feelings. Human beings are not rational, robotic decision makers. They are feeling machines.

Emotional discipline touches the five keys to an amazing mindset.

Rewriting Our Narrative

Part of our narrative is based on the way we feel about issues regarding where we are now and where we want to go. It takes emotional discipline to look at our narrative and see what parts need to change.  

Habits

No matter where you are in life, no matter how positive or negative, it takes emotional discipline to change or maintain your...