What Are You Responsible For?

clarity Nov 06, 2020

 

Our lives are not independent of outside factors. We are dependent on the actions of others.  We are part of an ecosystem with other human beings. One characteristic of human beings is that we are not perfect beings. We all have different emotions, different mindset, and different experiences.  

 One component to an amazing mindset and an amazing narrative is personal responsibility.  With so many factors and so many random occurrences, it’s often challenging to decipher what we are and are not responsible for. In addition, with so many random occurrences coming at us, it’s often challenging to make sense of it all and to take personal responsibility for it. It’s even more challenging when you were born into a worse situation than someone else.

 My own personal mantra is my disability is not my fault, but it’s my responsibility. I am disabled because of a doctor’s negligence. However, I am responsible for making the best...

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Notes About 2021

Uncategorized Oct 30, 2020

There’s no doubt that 2020 has been one of the most unique and challenging years of our lives.  On television I heard 2020 referred to as “a long decade”. Although it’s been challenging for me personally and professionally, I feel that I have grown as a person.  I have enjoyed watching my boys, Andrew and Tyler, explore and grow.  I have enjoyed going for long rides in my wheelchair.  Lastly, I have grown as a writer.

It looks like this pandemic is going to be here for a lot longer than we expected.  Right now, we have about two months to go in this year of 2020, and it’s great time to at least think about how you want your life to look in 2021 and beyond.  Let’s face it, we have a little less control over lives.  We have fewer freedoms such as giving hugs, going to concerts, going to sporting events, family gatherings, etc. 

 This does not mean that we have to be at the mercy of the pandemic or...

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Limit- Don't Eliminate

Uncategorized Oct 23, 2020

We all have areas in our lives where we struggle, and it often feels as if we can only get rid of certain emotions, people, problems, feelings, or anything else that gets in the way.  A common example of this is getting rid of challenges. We all have challenges that if we get rid of we will feel unstoppable. 

One of the keys to an amazing mindset is how you deal with challenges. I teach that challenges are meant to be engaged with in a positive way. Challenges or obstacles can lead to some great triumphs.

My disability forced me to start thinking about success and mindset. Because of my disability I took an opportunity to learn what it takes to become successful and what mindset really is.  I did not ignore my limitations or try to cancel all negative emotions. The goal is to limit and channel negativity.

We cant ignore or cancel whatever we dont like, or whatever gets in the way of amazing success. Instead, we have to understand how it effects our life...

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Exploring the Victim Mindset

narrative Oct 16, 2020

No matter who you are, you have life coming at you all the time. You must deal with the agenda of others. You must deal with your own weaknesses, insecurities, and other challenges. Nobody has a perfect life. With so much coming at us, oftentimes we take on a victims mindset. I want to explore what a victim mindset is and show you how to rewrite your narrative to turn that mindset into an empowering one.

It would have been easy for me to take on a victim mindset, and, if Im not careful, a victim mindset can take over at any minute. It is so easy for a victim mindset to take over. A victim mindset is blaming our setbacks on outside factors. There is a difference between being a victim and having a victim mindset. The statement dont be a victim” never made sense to me. I feel that Im a victim of cerebral palsy. Minorities should not deny the fact that racism still exists. If you are robbed, then you are a victim of robbery. The number one goal...

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You Get What You Give

Uncategorized Oct 08, 2020

Let’s face it. This is one of the most challenging times and one of the most unique times that many of us have faced. We are dealing with a once in a century pandemic and the ramifications of it. We are on a doorstep of a consequential election. We are also dealing with racial questions. These are just some of the consequential issues that are before us.

 My first book was about loving your life. My second book was about how people need to sacrifice for their dreams. For the past couple of years, I have been writing about how to develop an amazing mindset. In all three, one of the through lines is what you put into your life is what you get out of your life.

 From a young age, my parents instilled this narrative that what you put into your life is what you get out of it. They never let me act like a victim. They always brought joy, laughter, and love to every situation. Bottom line is they are loving and helping people.

 If we are going to move forward, we have...

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Redefine Strength

clarity narrative Oct 02, 2020

 

 A big part of success is developing our strengths and mindset required for whatever we want to accomplish, whether that’s growing a company, getting ahead in our industry or even raising children. Part of our narrative is what strength really means.

 If I ask you to imagine a strong person, you might envision a tough, rugged, person.  Unfortunately, different goals take different strengths. Our narrative about what strength is can often get in the way of developing the true strengths that are needed in order to accomplish our goals.

 My disability forced me to redefine my definition of what it means to be strong. My mindset was strongly influenced by my parents who are two of the strongest people I know. Part of my father’s success was due to sheer hustle. When my dad was younger, we joked that my dad would never walk. Everything was a slow run.

 The way my parents achieved success was not an option for me. I had to create my own...

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It Is What It Is

clarity Sep 24, 2020

Oftentimes, it’s challenging to make sense of our lives and it feels that life often happens to us.  Nobody has total control over their life and circumstances. With that being said, part of our job is to take control of the aspects that we can and have faith that the rest will work itself out.

There is a popular saying that is often used to understand the randomness of life, but there is another way of looking at the statement that can be empowering.

 Are you ready?

 The statement is…

Wait for it…

 It is what it is

 Traditionally, people use this statement when life happens to them. Guess what? Life happens to everybody. If you’re human, life happens. You are going to have bad days. You are going to have unexpected expenses. You are going to have disagreements. You are going to have rude waiters. And so on. Guess what? So, does everybody else.

 Realize that there are two powerful parts of life. There is reality and there is...

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Stop Performing Mental Gymnastics

Uncategorized Sep 18, 2020

 From the beginning of time, human beings have pondered the meaning of life. This trend continues today. We all have a certain desire to find purpose and meaning, especially the meaning of times during turmoil.

As a disabled person, I have spent countless hours wondering why I am disabled and the simplest answer is that it was a result of unfortunate circumstances at my birth. I can, and I have, pondered other crazy reasons. Did I do something in my past life? Am I meant to learn a lesson? The conclusion is that I need to live out my amazing life and the simplest explanation is empowering. It was just a set of unfortunate circumstances.

Occam’s razor is a scientific theory that the simplest answer might be the best answer.  The simplest answer to the coronavirus it is a once-in-a-century unfortunate occurrence.  When you make that simple conclusion, then you accept the path forward.

In college, I had a idea of writing a book. My marketing professor introduced me...

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All You Need Is 5 Minutes

clarity Sep 11, 2020

 

We all have dreams and goals. We also have challenges that get in the way of our goals. Lastly, we all have obligations that take up our time and energy. There is very little left over for our dreams. It seems that we are pulled in different directions. However, I believe that big dreams take small sacrifices and we can start achieving our dreams and our goals five minutes at a time. 

Have you ever had an issue that annoyed you?  It could be as simple as a rattle in your car. It could be a buggy computer. It could be that something small is off.  More annoying than that is when a couple of weeks go by and it turns out that you fixed it within five minutes. I’m asking you to apply that to the rest of your life. I want you to start achieving your goals five minutes at a time. 

Of course, it’s going to take you more than five minutes to achieve your goals, but the goal of this concept is to get you out of your old mindset and get you into a new...

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Shifting Behavior

habits Aug 28, 2020

 

 One of the building blocks and engines of your life is the way you behave. Behaviors lead to actions, repetitive actions are your habits, and habits translate into the way that you live your life. If you want to improve your life, you have to shift your behavior.

 A common mistake that most people have is that they want their life to improve without shifting their behavior. They blame the system, socioeconomic issues, or the fact that there are not enough opportunities. There might be great truths in these assumptions. However, your goals should not be to constantly find evidence of these truths. The goal is to shift your behavior to live out your goals and dreams.

 I have been there. My disability makes part of life impossible. It makes some activities ten times more challenging. I have to deal with my physical disabilities, the psychological ramifications, and any other challenge that are part of the human condition. I have learned that I need to be focused...

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