Calmly Anxious

blog Jun 27, 2013

My life is about to change…in the best way possible. I often wondered if I would ever have a child, and now–on July 8th–baby Andrew is due to come into the world.

(By the way, that little boy already has more stuff than I do! This is a dream come true.)

Like any first time father, I always assumed that I would have a “freak out moment” when my wife became pregnant, but I’m calm.

Over the years, I thought about what it means to be a father. To me, part of being a father is picking up the baby, changing diapers, watching the baby when my wife goes out to dinner, and other things as the child grows older, like coaching his baseball team. I have friends who have children and I watch them interact, knowing that the interaction I have with my child(ren) will be different. It used to sadden me that I would never be able to go to a baseball game with my kid until he’s sixteen, so he can drive his pops.

Surprisingly, those emotions have not come up...

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Upside Down

blog Jun 13, 2013

There are parts of my life that are completely upside down. I am a very outgoing person. I love interacting with people, I love going out with friends, and I’m always up for any new adventure. I’m not a homebody at all. I like to travel, would rather go to the movies than watch a movie at home, go out to dinner, stay up until two o’clock in the morning, and I’m very spontaneous.

But why do I have to be this way?

My life would be a lot easier if I was an introverted homebody. Someone who loved to be home in my sweats with a good book or go online for hours. Someone who does not feel isolated without constant face-to-face conversation.

Also, why do I love going to the airport and getting on a plane? Let me explain that for someone in an electric wheelchair like me, getting on an airplane is an ordeal, to say the least. It’s probably ten times the hassle that the average person has to deal with to get through TSA.

I wouldn’t change a thing about my...

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Creating Fans

blog May 30, 2013

As I embark into another leg of my professional career, I am taking into great consideration who I want to work with. I am looking at different business models including who I want to work and market with.

I came to the conclusion that I want to work with individuals I am a fan of, and not just people I happen to like on Facebook. I’m talking about people who blow me away and fascinate me.

On the other hand, I am trying to get my message out. Instead of forcing my message on people, my goal is to make them fans. Instead of ramming my message down their throats, I try to be more organic with my blog.

Great companies are trying to create fans. Perhaps the greatest example of this is Apple. Apple is one of the best in creating lifetime fans. They focus first on making really cool products. My sister Sanaz became a fan by first buying an iPad, then an iPhone, then when she needed to buy a computer, she bought a MacBook because she wanted everything to integrate. I have four Sony...

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Perfect

blog May 16, 2013

I have been working on my autobiography for a couple of years on and off, and plan to publish it later this year. As a writer, I want to tweak it over and over again and make it perfect. I learned that it will never be perfect and I will never be one hundred percent satisfied with it. That brings me to the next point: the publication date. I am excited to have a baby, and it will be easy for me to keep pushing it back, waiting for the baby to be three months, then six months, then a year, then—oh, I have to wait for his wedding. There is never going to be a perfect time.

I believe that perfection is the enemy of greatness.

I have been wanting to get back on the stage to speak and last year was a cathartic search of what I wanted my speaking career to look like. One issue that I had was making sure the people who would be my on-stage facilitators would be there for me. I’m talking to two great friends of mine who both said yeah, let’s do this. Despite this, I was...

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Good to Great

blog May 02, 2013

I am in the middle of reading the book Good to Great by Jim Collins. He describes a meeting with a POW of the Vietnam War named Jim Stockdale. Stockdale described how only the optimists were defeated, because they would say to themselves, “We’re going to get out by Christmas!” Then nothing. Then they would say, “We’re going to get out by Easter!” Then nothing. Eventually, they would be defeated.

In my last post, I wrote how I’m going to get upset when I can’t interact with my child the way I want to. Despite this, I’m going to have a good time. I contend that this attitude is going to soften the blow when I cannot do something.

In every sense of the word, I’m a dreamer, and I was crazy enough to think my dreams could come true. After I have a dream, I have to bring my dream into reality. There are times when I think about walking, hopping in the car, or just taking a backpacking tour across Europe. I understand that there...

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Fatherhood

blog Apr 11, 2013

One of the first pieces of furniture I bought is a big ottoman that sits in the middle of my living room near my big screen TV. For the first couple of months that I lived in my house, I imagined maybe some day my future wife would put our baby on the ottoman and I would get on my knees and just stare. I don’t know why, but every week or so, that was the thought. And now…in July, it will happen. My wife Leslie will put baby Andrew on the ottoman and daddy is going to play with him. On the other hand, I’ve always thought that it will tear me up when I’m not able to do certain things with my child…with Andrew. I was at a barbeque on Saturday and watched a friend of mine pick up his newborn. I’m trying not to let my negative emotion affect me, but how could it not? There has always been a dichotomy about what’s reality and what I see every day. I see a baby in their mother’s lap, I see a little girl getting ice cream with her dad, I...

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Right in the Thick of Things

blog Mar 28, 2013

This year has been amazing, to say the least. My wife is pregnant with our son Andrew, I’m starting a new business venture, and I’m happy. For years I’ve been stuck, but now I am right where I want to be. Right in the thick of things. I have two great friends from USC who are like brothers. I received the news that their wives are pregnant. I’ve known these guys for over a decade. In the past, whenever I heard of any engagement, pregnancy, or some big news, I always thought that there was a possibility that it would never happen for me. However, again, now I am right in the thick of things. Last Sunday I watched my baby sister Sanaz marry my new brother-in-law Nathan. Instead of feeling left behind, I had the privilege of walking my wife down the aisle as a groomsman. As a brother, and as a man, I could not feel prouder. My life as a disabled person has been filled with ups and downs, wondering if I’m going to live a good life. And now…my life is...

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Celebrating Anomalies

blog Mar 14, 2013

There are stories about random encounters that lead to great success…

The writer who gets discovered while having a conversation in a Coffee Shop.

The model discovered while strolling the streets of Paris, while on vacation from Montana.

The media loves these stories because they bring out the random extraordinary moments in life.

When determining your own path to success, these stories can be inspiring, but shouldn’t be focused on. What isn’t celebrated in the media is good old fashioned hard work. We don’t hear stories about the business owner who spends twenty years to build a business. This is the ordinary, not the exception.

People look at LeBron James with his great physical strength and think to themselves that they’ll never get there. The fact is that LeBron could be considered a freak of nature and, yes, he works hard, but what would he do without his size and physical strength?

In 1974, this guy went home and met a nineteen year old...

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Happiness & Loose Ends

blog Feb 28, 2013

Happiness

Two weeks ago I wrote a blog post about happiness and I want to expand on that with a couple of thoughts.

I still contend that one of the biggest impediments to achieving success is the fact that it’s sometimes a lot simpler to make ourselves happy in the short term. Unfortunately, that short term happiness hurts us in the long run. When I say short term, I mean things like getting a drink with friends or buying an overpriced item in the window when you know you can’t afford it.  By doing this, you are asking the rest of your life to compensate for your indiscretions.

I have also been thinking about what successful people do. The more I think about it, the more I realize one of the things they do is they have a list of things that they need to accomplish, and they tackle this same list over and over again. Their list might be revised from time to time, but they pretty much stick to it. I didn’t realize this until now.

I am really focusing on my list....

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A Choice to be Happy

blog Feb 14, 2013

I have been thinking a lot about happiness and to tell you the truth, I’ve been happy all my life…but not this happy. For about a month I’ve been thinking about happiness and my conclusion is it’s easy to be happy in the short-run, but if you want to be happy in the long-run, it’s work.

Why?

????

Usually what makes you happy in the short-run hurts you in the long-run. Putting that yummy, scrumptious chocolately mmm-mmm good cookie in your mouth makes you happy. Charging one thousand dollars on your credit card makes you happy. In the long-run, however, it only puts added stress in your life.

In no way, shape, or form am I depriving myself of what I love. I love to shop, I love to eat great foods, I love to go to Vegas, but right now I am focused on being happy in the long-run. Not putting a Band-Aid on my feelings.

The Hard Part

It’s difficult to let go of your old habits and your old Band-Aids, and it’s easy to feel better right now. My...

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